Or do I just listen to The Sound of Silence until inspiration appears and right words form on this page?
or shall I just remember the horrible weekend and see where it leads?
I remember two decades ago, when I was younger, fitter, and less cynical that the call to alarm would have generated more fear, more adrenaline.
The old narrative replayed. Perhaps I should just say it plain, but then and now mix, mingle, and confuse themselves among the streams of time – weaving a past into a present to create a future.
Was it Wednesday eleven days or eleven years ago when I was sitting in that boring meeting where the bosses argued among themselves, when my phone rang? The number on the screen begged – demanded answer. Another old friend died, my brother reported.
Another good man gone. Another empty place at the table. A happy man sent to his untimely rest.
I returned to the conference room to listen to arguments that no longer seemed to matter.
Then it became sunny Saturday and I decided to play with my new saw in the workshop. The dream of building something with the notion that a little solitude and the scream of a saw might just be the song I need.
Twenty-five years ago my phone didn’t ring on a Saturday when it was supposed to. I called my father and after he didn’t answer I drove. Fear turned to reality as I found blood on the wall and him on the floor. Rapid phone calls, fire fighters, paramedics, ambulance, and the hospital that became my life for the next two weeks as father slowly recovered from yet another stroke.
Reverie dissolved on the Saturday after the Wednesday as the unknown caller left a voice mail, then a text with the alarm, “I’m your brother’s boss.” My brother had fallen down some steps and needed family. I was closest to the scene.
More phone calls, shop doors closed and the mystery of the saw depth stop abandoned. Old fears, old lessons moved my feet – get a jacket, a bottle of water, tissue, cash for the hospital cafeteria, and drive urgently, not recklessly.
No blood this time, just confusion and a brother needing help – with the fear of how far will this go? How many nights? How many hospital visits? What loss will endure? I got him in my car and drove and called.
The hospital turned fear to hope and hope to relief as the next day the phone rang with his wife reporting that he was being sent home – now. The old story refused to be told as my wife brought a pot of stew, and basket of rolls to celebrate and sustain good news.
Yesterday, two brothers and two wives sat in the pews,
remembering the life of our old friend.
we remembered his kindness.
we remembered his calling all flowers nasturtiums.
we remembered his ever-present smile.
we remembered his 60 years singing in the choir.
Today, it’s raining, sending me out of the shop and to my computer to see if there is a story for me to tell.
What song tells the story of a friend lost and a brother recovered?
Peace,
Andrew
Andrew's View of the Week 
Sorry for your loss, Andrew, and glad your brother has recovered. These dreadful telephone calls – or their absence – change lives in a blink.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I’m sorry for you loss. Glad your brother is okay. What scary phone calls!
LikeLiked by 1 person
This is one beautiful post, Andrew. I’m so glad your brother has recovered but sorry for the loss of your dear friend. You explained the emotions perfectly and so honestly. Thank you.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks for your kind words and had lunch with my brother today – he’s doing well.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Your beautiful introspective words perfectly paint a picture of loss and fear of loss. And a simple phone call can change everything about our life views.
LikeLiked by 3 people
It’s amazing how fast a phone call can change everything.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Sorry for your loss. Life is short and fragile, everything else is immaterial.
LikeLiked by 1 person
thank you.
LikeLike
The abstract connections run the deepest. Thank you for making them, Andrew.
LikeLiked by 1 person
as I grow older, I am constantly amazed at the complex connections that build a life.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Beautifully written. At a certain age, life becomes bittersweet: The celebration of good fortune overlaid with ever-mounting loss. When we were younger we never had that stab of worry when the phone rang…
My deepest sympathies on the loss of your friend; and heartfelt relief at your brother’s recovery.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank for your kind words. It’s been a weird couple of weeks.
LikeLike
I’m so happy your brother is doing better. These sorts of things–it’s why I couldn’t take the opinions of a boss who cared mostly about the business seriously anymore. Finally. This life, this is better.
Take care, Andrew.
LikeLiked by 1 person
He’s doing just fine. Thanks.
LikeLike
I’m starting this comment, but then I don’t know what to add. Strange, though, how this season brings remembrances. A sombre side to Xmas; a reminder of the cruelty of winter perhaps…now I’m starting to ramble, but you know what I mean.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I do know.
LikeLike
Peace indeed Andrew. All stories have an end, some sad, some thankfully happy. Enjoy the season
LikeLiked by 1 person
some times a little of both.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Diamond Rio — One More Day
LikeLiked by 1 person