Friday Wisdom – Painting

Posted on 09/24/2021 by Andrew Reynolds

This week I’ve been painting the outside of my shed so here you go:

I’ve been studying art history. This painter called ‘Renaissance’ is just amazing.

What do painters do when it gets cold? They put on another coat.

Did you hear about the angry painter? He was making a scene.

My painter friend’s wife just left him. Yes, he got the brush off.

Called a painter to paint my house. When he answered the phone the first thing he said was, “yellow.”

I’ going to write a book on house painting. It’s going to be a primer for painting.

Why don’t you see painters wearing a sweater? Because they’ve already put on two coats.

My cats have taken up painting as a hobby. Mostly they just do paw-traits.

I entered the paint catapult contest – won with flying colors.

What’s red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

I painted half of my face like a clown and went for a drive. Don’t think anyone saw the funny side.

Just before going to bed, the painter drew curtains.

About Andrew Reynolds

Born in California Did the school thing studying electronics, computers, release engineering and literary criticism. I worked in the high tech world doing software release engineering and am now retired. Then I got prostate cancer. Now I am a blogger and work in my wood shop doing scroll saw work and marquetry.
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25 Responses to Friday Wisdom – Painting

  1. jfwknifton says:
    09/27/2021 at 1:10 am

    davidprosser added his own joke and I found one too:

    Why was the artist in jail? He was framed.

    A bit obvious, and nowhere as good as The Maestro, with his joke about painting half of your face like a clown.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Diane Henders says:
    09/26/2021 at 9:47 pm

    Thanks for the chuckles! This is probably the only time you’ll find me smiling when house-painting is the topic. 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  3. ParentingIsFunny says:
    09/26/2021 at 2:48 pm

    Flying colors. Teehee. Although, of course, I love the paw prints. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Mama's Empty Nest says:
    09/25/2021 at 9:04 am

    As always, you never let me down on Fridays for a good laugh. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Baydreamer says:
    09/25/2021 at 7:04 am

    Thanks for the smiles, Andrew, and have a good weekend!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. davidprosser says:
    09/24/2021 at 1:47 pm

    The Scottish painter had an accident, He asked the doctor why hw was limping. “It’s your leg man” he was told” it’s gan green”.
    Have a Nice Weekend Andrew,
    Hugs

    Liked by 3 people

  7. Jacqui Murray says:
    09/24/2021 at 11:20 am

    This retirement agrees with you, Andrew!

    Liked by 2 people

  8. robertawrites235681907 says:
    09/24/2021 at 10:53 am

    Thanks, Andrew, and happy Friday to you.

    Liked by 2 people

  9. Nadine Gordon says:
    09/24/2021 at 9:23 am

    Thanks for the laughs Andrew!
    I especially liked the clown reference 🤣 😂

    Liked by 2 people

  10. Sheila Landry Designs says:
    09/24/2021 at 9:18 am

    . . . you had me at ‘painting’. 😀 Thank you for the Friday smiles. I will have to share some of these with my artful friends.

    Liked by 3 people

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