Friday Wisdom – Flying

This week we’ve had a friend visiting and today we’ll be taking her to the airport so here’s everything I told her about flying:

A good landing is one you can walk away from. An excellent land is one where you can use the airplane again.

Be careful of clouds withs silver linings – it just might be another airplane flying right at you.

The propeller on an airplane is just a big fan to keep the pilot cool. When it stops you can actually see the pilot starting to sweat.

The trouble with airplane jokes is that some are so bad that they don’t land.

It takes a long time to design an airplane – well, no one really wants a ground breaking design.

I came up with a great idea for a new kind of airplane, but I’m not sure it will fly.

Two wrongs don’t make a right, but two Wrights did make an airplane …

Like a new shirt, when you buy an airplane, you can’t keep the hanger.

The seats on most airplanes are so close together that I often get jet leg.

I was seating next to a crying baby and asked for a different seat to get away from it. Turns out you can’t do that if the baby is yours.

I threw my cell phone off the roof, but it landed on the driveway and broke into a million pieces. I don’t understand – I had airplane mode on …

Do you know the difference between an optimist and a pessimist? An optimist designed an airplane. The pessimist invented seat belts.

My friend said she was sick of going to the airport. It might be Terminal Illness.

I was scheduled to do a standup comedy show about airline flights, but it got canceled.

About Andrew Reynolds

Born in California Did the school thing studying electronics, computers, release engineering and literary criticism. I worked in the high tech world doing software release engineering and am now retired. Then I got prostate cancer. Now I am a blogger and work in my wood shop doing scroll saw work and marquetry.
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23 Responses to Friday Wisdom – Flying

  1. Terminal illness….I’ve had that from sitting for 13 hours in one small airport after a flight was cancelled. Certainly made me sick of airports! šŸ˜‰

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Dave says:

    Late to the plane party. I’d heard the Wright brothers pun before, but not the one about the propellers and the pilot. My favorite.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I am late this week. šŸ™‚ It was a busy weekend. I always enjoy your Friday funnies. Have a great week ahead, Andrew!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. You can’t change seats if the baby is yours. Dang it!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. “Airplane mode on” – LOL! You always come up with such clever jokes! šŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Flojo says:

    She’ll probably retell those jokes on plane. Will make her very popular!

    Liked by 1 person

  7. The optimist-pessimist is pretty funny.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. jfwknifton says:

    Another set of excellent jokes. Love the one about the Wright Brothers.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Two Wrights did make an airplane! What fun to find you on Fridays.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. SusanR says:

    A particularly good batch of wisdom!

    Liked by 1 person

  11. WebbBlogs says:

    šŸ¤£šŸ¤£ ok, I will admit there are a lot of good ones here. šŸ¤£šŸ¤£

    Liked by 1 person

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