Friday Wisdom – Carpenters

I’m doing a little woodworking this week so here’s what I know about carpenters:

I was trying to figure out a pun about carpentry, but nothing wood work.

I interviewed for a job as a carpenter. I nailed it.

The one kind of nail carpenters don’t like to hit is a thumb nail.

A carpenter told me he didn’t like drills – he said he found them boring.

Did you hear about the carpenter who got fired? Never measured up.

At a party carpenters are always raising the roof.

What’s the most common bird you’ll find on a construction site? A crane.

Why was the carpenter found not guilt of murder? There was no concrete evidence.

I was working on a good construction joke, but there was no build-up.

Did you hear that they were working very hard on Big Ben – apparently they’re working around the clock.

I can cut a piece of wood in half by just looking at it. It’s true, I saw it with my own eyes.

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About Andrew Reynolds

Born in California Did the school thing studying electronics, computers, release engineering and literary criticism. I worked in the high tech world doing software release engineering and am now retired. Then I got prostate cancer. Now I am a blogger and work in my wood shop doing scroll saw work and marquetry.
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22 Responses to Friday Wisdom – Carpenters

  1. Dave's avatar Dave says:

    Oh my, I sense your list was just a smattering of the excellent carpenter puns out there (starting with “wood work”, LOL). Actually, my first thought was the Carpenters (Karen and Richard) but there’s no reason to kid about them. Loved their music.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. As a woodworker, you know I appreciate these a lot! Thank you! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Flojo's avatar Flojo says:

    I like raising the roof, Andrew. Must be more handy than I think.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Dare I say: You nailed it? 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  5. PiedType's avatar SusanR says:

    I agree. You saved the best for last.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. jfwknifton's avatar jfwknifton says:

    It’s the very last joke that wins for me this week. Well worth waiting for!

    Liked by 1 person

  7. All good for chuckles! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  8. “I saw it with my own eyes” – ha! Good ones, Andrew. Happy Friday! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  9. davidprosser's avatar davidprosser says:

    Great fun Andrew.You nailed it. Hugs

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Oh, that last one. groan (happily)

    Liked by 1 person

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