Veteran’s day was yesterday so this week I’ll share a bit of my military wisdom:
The minimum grades you need in high school to join the Navy are seven Cs.
Why couldn’t the sailors play cards? The Captain was sitting on the deck.
The Master Sergeant yelled at the private, “I didn’t see you at camouflage training this morning.” “Thank you sergeant,” replied the private.
The US government has started recruiting rabbits to join the hare force.
I was reading about a horrible accident at the army base – a tank ran over a box of popcorn and killed three kernels.
The most hated month in the army is: March
An airman, an infantry man, and a marine were having a drink at the enlisted man’s club:
Airman, “It was tough when the AC died in our tent.” It was a 110 outside.”
Infantry: “You had AC!?”
Marine: “You had a tent!”
Why won’t the army enlist Twitter users? They’re too quick to retweet.
Where to Generals keep their armies? Up their sleevies.
When setting up a camp: The coffee will taste better if the latrines are setup downstream from the camp.
How does a Navy Captain change a light bulb? She says, “Lieutenant have that light bulb changed.”
Basic orders for a sailor: If it moves, salute it. If it doesn’t move pick it up. If you can’t pick it up, paint it.
In the Army if you lose your rifle they’ll charge you $850. That’s why in the Navy, the captain goes down with the ship.