Friday Wisdom – Car Repair

Posted on 06/30/2023 by Andrew Reynolds

My car was in a minor fender bender and currently is in the shop. The damage is mostly cosmetic and no one was hurt so here’s everything I know about car repairs:

The shop said they couldn’t fix my brakes, so they just made the horn louder.

My car was making a strange humming noise. The mechanic said that was because it didn’t know the words.

I think my mechanic might be having memory problems, I took my car in for service and he asked what year is it.

So, would you need a current license to work on an electric car?

Don’t trust a car mechanic who rides a bicycle to work.

A jumper cable walks into a bar and the bartender yells, “Don’t start anything.”

The guy at the service center asked when I last rotated my tires. I said, “Every time I drive they rotate.”

To make a mechanical frog you can’t use bolts. You have to use rivets.

With all the research into self-driving cars, it won’t be long before we get a country song where a guy’s truck leaves him too.

Second law of stuck bolts: Don’t use force. Get a bigger hammer.

Unknown's avatar

About Andrew Reynolds

Born in California Did the school thing studying electronics, computers, release engineering and literary criticism. I worked in the high tech world doing software release engineering and am now retired. Then I got prostate cancer. Now I am a blogger and work in my wood shop doing scroll saw work and marquetry.
This entry was posted in wisdom and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

23 Responses to Friday Wisdom – Car Repair

  1. Alex's avatar Alex says:
    07/19/2023 at 5:23 am

    You’ve got a fantastic collection of, can I say it?, some pretty clever jokes. My most loved one was about the mechanic with memory issues, but the mechanical frog and the rivets were also really, really good.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Sheila Landry Designs's avatar Sheila Landry Designs says:
    07/04/2023 at 2:29 am

    Thank you for showing the humorous side of car repairs. I am sorry you got bumped. Glad you are OK, though. That is the important part. Have a great week.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. jfwknifton's avatar jfwknifton says:
    07/02/2023 at 3:16 am

    Sorry, I hit “return by mistake!

    Like

  4. jfwknifton's avatar jfwknifton says:
    07/02/2023 at 3:15 am

    An excellent assortment of, can I say it?, some rather subtle gags. My favourite one was about the mechanic with memory problems, although the mechanical frog and the rivets was very, very good.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Ilsa Rey's avatar ParentingIsFunny says:
    07/01/2023 at 7:46 pm

    The country song!

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Dave's avatar Dave says:
    07/01/2023 at 10:44 am

    A guy’s truck leaves him… heh. And anything that walks into a bar results in an LOL.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Flojo's avatar Flojo says:
    07/01/2023 at 7:03 am

    Friday is such fun with your funnies. These are all good. Thx!

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Jacqui Murray's avatar Jacqui Murray says:
    06/30/2023 at 5:10 pm

    That bigger hammer idea–it works for all sorts of life’s problems.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. joynealkidney's avatar joynealkidney says:
    06/30/2023 at 12:58 pm

    Fun! Except for the fender-bender part.

    Liked by 1 person

Comments are closed.