Friday Wisdom – Pizza

Posted on 02/09/2024 by Andrew Reynolds

As I’ve mentioned in the past I’m running for president as part of the Pizza Party. Our main aim is to stabilize the economy by setting up a federal agency that delivers fresh hot pizza to every American home on a Friday night. We’ll use only American grown and manufactured products — we foresee benefits such as, economic growth, improved health by providing fresh organic ingredients, and a major effect on Social media by turning the conversation from politics to why does the government make and deliver Hawaiian style pizzas. Also, Heather and I have been watching this great program on Netflix about pizza chefs so I am inspired by pizza. Here’s more information on the subject:

I’ve been working on a new pizza joke, but so far it’s kind of cheesy.

Can’t believe I did this, but I bunt my Hawaiian pizza. I should have used aloha temperature.

Why don’t pizzas play golf? They always slice.

I think the main difference between a pizza and a pizza joke is that a joke can’t be topped.

I was at the store yesterday and saw this new kind of vegan pizza, it’s called a pepperphony.

I never understood square pizzas, is it because pi are square?

The police just arrested a gang that was stealing frozen pizza. Apparently their plan wasn’t well thawed-out.

There are two types of people in this world, pizza lovers and liars.

I just read that Hollywood is going to make an action movie about a pizza. Working title is Pie Hard.

Did you hear about the pizzeria that went out of business? They never made enough dough.

My pizza broke, but I was able to put it back together with some tomato paste.

I always invite the mushroom to my pizza parties — he’s such a fungi!

I asked the pizza place to cut my pizza into 6 slices, because there’s no way I could 8 slices.

Do you know the difference between a good pizza joke and a bad pizza joke? The delivery.

How do you get a college graduate off your front porch? Pay for the pizza.

What would a pizza say if it could talk? I don’t know, but I’m sure it would be cheesy.

I burned 2000 calories today. That’s what happens when you forget about the pizza in the oven.

Unknown's avatar

About Andrew Reynolds

Born in California Did the school thing studying electronics, computers, release engineering and literary criticism. I worked in the high tech world doing software release engineering and am now retired. Then I got prostate cancer. Now I am a blogger and work in my wood shop doing scroll saw work and marquetry.
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33 Responses to Friday Wisdom – Pizza

  2. Dave's avatar Dave says:
    02/12/2024 at 7:41 am

    … and my vote as well. “Aloha temperature” and “Pie Hard” – take your pick as the best of these toppings!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Jesse Allen's avatar Abbrah Kahdavver says:
    02/11/2024 at 10:33 am

    pizza every friday? delivered? say no more, you’ve got my vote.

    Liked by 2 people

  4. jfwknifton's avatar jfwknifton says:
    02/11/2024 at 9:24 am

    I ,don’t know which is the funniest joke but the one about the Hawaiian pizza is certainly the cleverest!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Lauren Scott, Author's avatar Baydreamer - Lauren Scott says:
    02/10/2024 at 2:47 pm

    Brilliant, and now I’m craving pizza!

    Liked by 2 people

  6. Diane Henders's avatar Diane Henders says:
    02/10/2024 at 10:42 am

    Good ones, Andrew! (And now I want pizza – yum!) :-)

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Ilsa Rey's avatar ParentingIsFunny says:
    02/10/2024 at 7:14 am

    I keep thinking this was going to be too difficult to choose a favorite. Until I got to Pie Hard. 😆 I always enjoy your humor. I would definitely vote for you. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Sheila Landry Designs's avatar Sheila Landry Designs says:
    02/10/2024 at 3:55 am

    Pizza is always good. My dinner for tonight I think. 😀 Happy Weekend!

    Liked by 2 people

  9. Milena Alien's avatar Milena Alien says:
    02/09/2024 at 5:18 pm

    Makes me hungry just reading about it

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Mama's Empty Nest's avatar Mama's Empty Nest says:
    02/09/2024 at 2:59 pm

    Perfect! And yes, I’ll vote for you as President in the Pizza Party. Why? Because I love pizza and corny jokes!! 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  11. A. Swanson's avatar A. Swanson says:
    02/09/2024 at 1:49 pm

    Thanks for the laughs!

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Jacqui Murray's avatar Jacqui Murray says:
    02/09/2024 at 12:37 pm

    There are some gems in this list, Andrew.

    Liked by 1 person

  13. brilliantviewpoint's avatar brilliantviewpoint says:
    02/09/2024 at 10:35 am

    Great jokes. Isn’t that Netflix show wonderful!! Those Chefs sure work hard and dedicate their lives to the pizza craft.

    Liked by 2 people

  15. siskinbob's avatar siskinbob says:
    02/09/2024 at 9:47 am

    Andrew, I’d vote for you. And here’s my three ha’pence, there is no good reason to add pineapple to a pizza.

    Liked by 1 person

  16. joynealkidney's avatar joynealkidney says:
    02/09/2024 at 9:26 am

    Pepperphony, priceless! BTW I hear that today is National Pizza Day. Great timing, Andrew!

    Liked by 1 person

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