Friday Wisdom — Woodworking

I’ve been in the workshop a good part of the week on the scroll saw but there aren’t many jokes about scroll sawing so here’s what I know about woodworking in general:

I say a guy standing outside the big box store holding this sign: “Will work for new tools.”

When my wife says she wants me to build something I normally reply, “Sure, but I’ll need to buy … “

It’s not scrap — it’s modern art.

Woodworking: The art of cutting big pieces of wood into small pieces and then gluing them back together to make a big piece of wood.

Good judgement comes lots of experience and experience comes from lots and lots of mistakes.

I’m writing a construction joke, but it’s not done yet.

Never fix anything that can be explained away as a, “design feature.”

I save a lot of sandpaper by just slapping on a coat of paint and callling the project, “rustic”.

but in my defense, I was left unsupervised …

I heard that a bunch of folks were thinking of breaking off from the local woodworking club – I think it’s going to be a splinter group.

I did cut it twice – it’s still too short.

When I’m hugging a tree it’s not because I’m a tree lover. I’m estimating the board feet in the tree.

I’m so disappointed. The lumber yard delivered a single plan of wood at 5 pm today. They were supposed to deliver 2 by 4.

My mom’s sister was a woodwork, yup she was a carpenter aunt.

If you don’t think money grows on trees, clearly you have been a lumberyard lately.

DIY repairs are and addiction because you’re always look for your next fix.

About Andrew Reynolds

Born in California Did the school thing studying electronics, computers, release engineering and literary criticism. I worked in the high tech world doing software release engineering and am now retired. Then I got prostate cancer. Now I am a blogger and work in my wood shop doing scroll saw work and marquetry.

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