Friday Wisdom – Driving Cars

I had a long road trip this week to visit my brothers so here’s some info on cars:

When is a door not a not? When it’s ajar.

A state trooper pulls a man over for speeding and asks to see the man’s driving license. The man said, “I wish you’d make up your mind, first you take away my license and the next thing you want to see it.”

Don’t run behind a car, you’ll get exhausted and don’t run in front of a car – you might get tired.

What kind of car does a dinosaur drive? A tyrannosaurus wreck.

I saw my neighbor washing his car with his son. I still think he should use a sponge.

There was a frog on the on-ramp thumbing for a ride, so I stoped and said, “Hop in”

So if you hit by a guitar truck, would that be a fender-bender?

The frog was at the parking meter looking for his car. I had to tell him it had been toad.

I was on a bus and gave my seat to a blind person. And that’s how I lost my job as a bus driver.

Apparently snoring scares all the passengers in my car.

I tried building a car out of wood, but it wooden go.

Most common cause of ice cream trucks breaking down: rocky road

Did you hear Santa just got a motorcycle – a brand new Holly Davidson.

I don’t like to brag, but I just got back from buying something very expensive. Yup, went to the gas station.

About Andrew Reynolds

Born in California Did the school thing studying electronics, computers, release engineering and literary criticism. I worked in the high tech world doing software release engineering and am now retired. Then I got prostate cancer. Now I am a blogger and work in my wood shop doing scroll saw work and marquetry.
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24 Responses to Friday Wisdom – Driving Cars

  1. Favorite: I was on a bus and gave my seat to a blind person. And that’s how I lost my job as a bus driver.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Dave says:

    “Hop in”… well that brought a laugh. You should do a “Friday Wisdom” on frogs. Come to think of it, you probably already have. (“ribbit, ribbit”)

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I love your Friday posts! πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

  4. “I still think he should use a sponge.” – Hahahaha!!! They’re all good, but that one made me laugh out loud.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Thanks for the chuckles, having been through a week of car trouble. πŸ˜€

    Liked by 1 person

  6. That last one is relatable. I got gas today in my little, Smart Car. I got just over half a tank for $20. Oh, the excitement!

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Flojo says:

    I love the dinosaur one. My grandsons will, too. Thanks, Andrew, for the laughs.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. I needed that.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Good ones, especially that last one…but, come to think of it, it really isn’t funny, is it?

    Liked by 1 person

  10. jfwknifton says:

    Those are excellent!!! Your best for quite a while!!

    Liked by 1 person

  11. You make Fridays fun!

    Liked by 1 person

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