Friday Wisdom – Bike Riding

I was going to post wisdom about poets, but I took a bike ride today that was far more interesting. A few weeks ago I bought a bike rack for the car so Heather and I could go interesting places to ride our bikes. Today was a test drive for the rack and bike path we’ve been driving past for years. It was a nice ride until I fell off the bike. Don’t panic, the biggest injury was to my pride – the bike wasn’t hurt and the rack worked just fine to get us home. Well, here’s what I know about bikes:

I went to my neighbor to tell her that her dog has been chasing people on a bike. She said, that’s a lie – her dog doesn’t own a bike.

I think my bike needs a new chain – anyone have any links?

Years ago my grandson was praying loudly saying, “God please send me a new bike!” I said that God isn’t hard of hearing, to which he replied, “Yes, but grandma is.”

Recently I was offered a job at a bike factory. They want me to be their spokesman.

Just found out that the difference between a well dress man on a unicycle and poorly dressed man on a bicycle is … attire.

My bike keeps falling over – I think it’s two-tired.

I saw a lady on a bike and yelled “COW!!!”. She looked at me, flipped me off and ran right into the cow.

If you cross a bike with a flower, you’ll get some cycle pedals.

Just read a news story about a vampire bicycle that’s going around biting people – it’s a vicious cycle.

My bank manager had to give up riding a bike. He kept loosing his balance.

What is a professional cyclist who just broke up with his girlfriend? Homeless.

What does the baby bicycle call his dad? Pop-cycle.

I was going to try out a unicycle, but I’m two tired.

okay, okay, I’ll admit it – my bicycle puns can get tire-some.

First my bike chain started to rust, then my whole bicycle fell apart. I think it was a chain reaction.

Want some more cycling jokes or do you need a brake?

About Andrew Reynolds

Born in California Did the school thing studying electronics, computers, release engineering and literary criticism. I worked in the high tech world doing software release engineering and am now retired. Then I got prostate cancer. Now I am a blogger and work in my wood shop doing scroll saw work and marquetry.
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21 Responses to Friday Wisdom – Bike Riding

  1. Flojo says:

    As a grandma, I like the grandma joke, too, but all are cute. Hope you got back on the bike right away.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Dave says:

    Getting a bike rack for our car opened up a whole new world of riding. Suddenly I feel like we’re getting our money’s worth out of our bicycles. And the obvious answer to “want more cycling jokes?” is a resounding “yes”! “COW”… LOL.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Ha! Some wonderful groaners here – thanks! πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Good ones! My favorite? “Yes, but grandma is.” 🚲

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I forgot to add that our area is inundated with electric bikes now. All ages riding them, too.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Glad you’re okay and these are all great!

    Liked by 1 person

  7. So many good ones here, but I think I laughed the loudest at “β€œYes, but grandma is.” πŸ™‚ Thanks, Andrew!

    Liked by 1 person

  8. jfwknifton says:

    An excellent standard of jokes, as always !

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Ray V. says:

    Nicely assembled

    Like

  10. These are cute, as always. πŸ™‚ I like the ‘spokesman’ one. Have a great weekend. I am off to read about your shed progress. πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

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