Friday Wisdom – Gardening

I’ve been doing some work in the garden this week and here’s a few thoughts on gardening:

Why did the tomato blush? He saw the salad dressing.

What vegetable did Noah not take on the ark? Leeks

Why don’t people laugh at gardening jokes? they’re too corny

How do you keep a dog from digging in your garden? Take away his shovel.

Name something everyone has on their face: Tulips

What do you get if you divide the circumference of a pumpkin by its diameter? Well, pumpkin pi of course …

I went to listen to a talk by a master gardener about herbs. It was sage advice.

When I was a kid, I made a lot of money removing leaves from gardens – I just raked it in.

I told my wife that I didn’t think those were the right shoes for gardening, but now she digging in her heals.

Grass is dangerous – it’s full of blades.

Never put a plant on a cheerleading team – they only root for themselves.

I saw my neighbor digging $20 bills into his garden. He said he wanted to make the soil richer.

About Andrew Reynolds

Born in California Did the school thing studying electronics, computers, release engineering and literary criticism. I worked in the high tech world doing software release engineering and am now retired. Then I got prostate cancer. Now I am a blogger and work in my wood shop doing scroll saw work and marquetry.
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20 Responses to Friday Wisdom – Gardening

  1. These are GREAT, always ENJOY and APPRECIATE your Friday humor.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Tom Crossley says:

    Oh wow, bring out the drumset. I enjoyed them though hehe πŸ˜€

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Lots of good ones, Andrew. Take away the dog’s shovel. Teehee. πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

  4. ‘Pumpkin pi’ – hahaha!!! That one really tickled my funnybone. (And my appetite – now I want pumpkin pie.) πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

  5. SusanR says:

    So that’s why people warn you to keep off their grass!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Franknbean says:

    Ha ha, thanks for all of them be they reruns or not. I’m positive the $20 bills joke was told to me as a child but was with coins or at most $1 bills.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. jfwknifton says:

    Well, this week it’s a dead heat between the tulips and the pumpkins!

    Like

  8. Who comes up with these????

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Happy Friday, Andrew. Thank you as always for the smiles. You are always so clever!

    Liked by 1 person

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