Friday Wisdom – Christmas

Well, you likely guessed the wisdom subject of the week, yup Christmas. We’ve put up a lot of decorations and the family has heard most of my Christmas wisdom so now it’s your turn.

Santa’s elves are commonly known as subordinate clauses.

On the day before Christmas, Adam was heard saying, “Hey, it’s Christmas, Eve!”

I’ve got a great Christmas Lighting joke – this one will sleigh you …

Santa deposits the Elves wages in a Snow Bank.

I heard about a blind reindeer – I have no eye deer what to call it.

What’s red, white and blue? A sad candy cane

My grandson says he doesn’t believe in Santa – the kid’s a rebel without a Claus.

Christmas lights are like co-workers, half don’t work and the other half aren’t that bright.

I’m a little disappointed that my Christmas lights go out more often than I do.

It’s just possible that the Christmas lights are a filament of your imagination.

My neighborhood has a tallest Christmas tree competition. After seeing the all the entries I thought, “How am I going to top that?”

I read that reindeer put hornaments on their Christmas trees.

Did you hear about the person who stole Advent calendars? He was sentenced to 25 days.

The most common Christmas wine: “I don’t like Brussels spouts.”

About Andrew Reynolds

Born in California Did the school thing studying electronics, computers, release engineering and literary criticism. I worked in the high tech world doing software release engineering and am now retired. Then I got prostate cancer. Now I am a blogger and work in my wood shop doing scroll saw work and marquetry.
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24 Responses to Friday Wisdom – Christmas

  1. πŸŽ„ Happy New Year!


  2. All of this Christmas wisdom is great…..made me smile. πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

  3. “Subordinate clauses”! ARGH! I’m still laughing… πŸ˜€

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Always delightful reading. πŸ™‚ Happy Christmas Season to you! πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Dave says:

    “… Adam was heard saying…” – oh, that’s good!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Thanks for making me laugh! I needed that today.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Enjoyed sharing your “wisdom” on Twitter!

    Liked by 1 person

  8. jfwknifton says:

    As always, a good laugh at the end of the week. I particularly enjoyed the “rebel without a Claus”.

    Liked by 2 people

  9. Flojo says:

    I can always count on you for end-of-work -week chuckles. Thanks, Andrew. Looking forward to next week’s funnies.

    Liked by 2 people

  10. lifelessons says:

    Andrew, are they all your own inventions? Want to give credit where it is due.

    Liked by 2 people

  11. lifelessons says:

    These are really clever. I’m stealing them!!!!

    Liked by 2 people

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