Friday Wisdom – Cats

Yesterday I posted pictures of the kitty outhouse build so naturally today is all about cats:

From Andrew’s dictionary, Cat, noun: A small furry mammal that is always on the wrong side of a door.

I knew a cat that loved bowling, they called it an alley cat.

My cats are afraid of trees. I think it’s because of the bark.

Maybe my imagination, but I’m sure I heard my cats singing, “Three Blind Mice.”

My neighbor’s cat was in an accident and lost its tail, but they got him a new one at a retail store.

Do you know what’s worse than raining cats and dogs? Hailing taxis.

My cats wants a car to drive – anyone know where I can get a furrari?

Your grammar lesson for today: The difference between a cat and a comma is that one has the paws before the claws, and the other has the clause before the pause.

I do a lion impression at parties. It’s always a roaring success.

My kitten told me that it wants to join the police force. Nothing wrong with a career in claw enforcement.

I went the library and asked if they had a book on Pavlov’s dogs and Schrodinger’s cat. The librarian said, “That rings a bell, but I don’t know if it’s here or not.”

About Andrew Reynolds

Born in California Did the school thing studying electronics, computers, release engineering and literary criticism. I worked in the high tech world doing software release engineering and am now retired. Then I got prostate cancer. Now I am a blogger and work in my wood shop doing scroll saw work and marquetry.
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14 Responses to Friday Wisdom – Cats

  1. Terry says:

    you have a real talent for this sort of thing.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Where can I get a furrari?? 🙂 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Apostolis X says:

    Having a cat since 2009 I’ve never could imagine those jokes

    Liked by 1 person

  4. jfwknifton says:

    I wouldn’t have understood your last joke except for watching “The Big Bang Theory”. Overall, a real good laugh, as always.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Good ones all, but the last one especially made me laugh! 😀

    Liked by 1 person

  6. A lion impression. That I’d like to see.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Made me look up the cat one! What fun!

    Liked by 1 person

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