Last week I had a conversation with my financial advisor and today I went to an ATM so here’s everything I know about banks and money:
My father used to say, “In God we trust. All others pay cash.”
Money talks, but chocolate sings.
Always borrow money from pessimists – the don’t expect to get it back.
It’s bad enough that banks and jewelry stores get robbed, but robbing a bakery? That takes the cake.
I’m thinking of moving my bank accounts to Ireland – I hear their capital’s Dublin.
River’s are always rich. Well, they do have two banks.
The skeleton said he couldn’t rob a bank – he just doesn’t have the guts …
So, if money talks, why are there bank tellers?
I read that a naked man robbed a bank here in town. The police can’t find him – no witnesses saw his face.
My local bank just announced they’re going to buy some cows. They said they needed to beef up security.
My father said to work till I have a bank balance that looks like a phone number – I now have $9.11 in savings. (£9.99 to you of the UK persuasion).
So I don’t understand, if money doesn’t grow on trees, why do banks have branches?
My mother used to keep her money in the freezer – she always said there was nothing like cold hard cash.
The bank manager had to quit riding his bicycle – kept losing his balance.
The store said they’d get me a rain check from their cloud bank.
I told my wife that I had no interest in banking … she said I wasn’t a lone.