Friday Wisdom – Cats

We’ve been mostly snowed in here the last week so what do you do when snowed in? Drink tea, read books and let the cats sit on your lap, so here’s everything I know about cats:

Cat defined: A small furry mammal who is always on the wrong side of a door.

Dogs have owners. Cats have staff.

There is a special kind of cat that likes to go bowling – alley cats.

My cats like sitting by my computer watching the mouse.

I just read that a woman was removed from a flight because she let the cat out of the bag.

It was terrible, my neighbors cat lost it’s tail. They had to take it to a re-tail store.

What did the cat say after it ate a clownfish? That tasted funny.

My local police department just hired a bunch of cats for a claw enforcement squad.

Did you know that the Cheshire Cat’s favourite drink is evaporated milk?

I discovered that you have to be carful when it’s raining cats and dogs – you might step in a Poodle.

I went to the library and asked for a book on Pavlov’s dog and Schrodinger’s cat. The reference librarian said, “Rings a bell, but I don’t know whether it’s here or not.”

Is it true that a cat’s favorite song is The Three Blind Mice?

I saw a cat running away from a tree. I think it was afraid of its bark.

Well, enough of all that, I just feel fur-tunate to be a cat owner.

This week a bonus – actual pictures of my cats:

Spotty Kitty – small and ferocious little madam

Boots – large lovable lap cat but she only has two brain cells and no ability to use both at the same time.

Mr. Socks – thinks he’s in charge of everything and this is his favorite bed.

About Andrew Reynolds

Born in California Did the school thing studying electronics, computers, release engineering and literary criticism. I worked in the high tech world doing software release engineering and am now retired. Then I got prostate cancer. Now I am a blogger and work in my wood shop doing scroll saw work and marquetry.
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33 Responses to Friday Wisdom – Cats

  1. Still laughing after I’ve scrolled down ALL these comments. πŸ˜„
    We watched a documentary on cats this week. This says it all: β€œDogs have owners. Cats have staff.” πŸ˜‚

    Liked by 1 person

  2. You listed all the reasons I LOVE being snowed in! πŸ˜€ Tea, books, and cats! πŸ˜€ Your kitties are all adorable! We have a lovely older kitty (18.5 years old – a beautiful black (and now peppered with grey) kitty we call Coco). We say her brain runs on one piston. But she is the most gentle and dear cat that has ever owned us. Our little old lady. We got her from a shelter at six weeks and she has had a lovely life. Thank you for showing your family. I love them ALL! ❀

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Shannon Thomas says:

    Such sweet kitties! And thanks for the catastic jokes! My daughter is going to love them, especially with our new feline in our own house, Lacey.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Okay, I forgot all the jokes once I saw the cats. I think I’ll take Spotty Kitty for my lap first, please. Although Mr. Socks looks like an expert cuddler… Hmm. You know what, I’ll take any of them. Meow Meow! Sunggle snuggle. Mrrow.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Drink tea, read books and let the cats sit on your lap?!?!?! Before I even read the rest of this, I had to comment that I’m loving this already. The only downside to the tea drinking is having to get up to use the bathroom, which means disrupting the cat(s). On the other hand, they help keep your seat warm, so…

    Okay, back to the reading.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Dave says:

    Our single, very demanding cat lies next to me as I read this post. She’s a former barn cat who now fully embraces the comforts of being indoors. Pretty sure another cat would be shown the door if we ever considered getting her a companion. Our dog is lucky he’s allowed to stay.

    Liked by 1 person

    • We only have the three because we rescued the whole litter. They’ve never had a house to themselves, but they have divided the place among them. Your dog must have some use to the cat …


  7. jfwknifton says:

    As always, an excellent set of funnies, with an impressive reference to Shrodinger’s cat towards the end.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Made me look up Schrodinger’s cat!

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Awww, kitty pictures! They’re adorable – thanks for the warm fuzzies. πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

  10. A lot of fun one-liners here, Andrew.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. SusanR says:

    Anything feline, I’m in. All of these are cute but I like Schrodinger’s the best. And I enjoyed meeting your resident kitties.

    Liked by 2 people

  12. So many FUNNY ones!

    Liked by 2 people

  13. Um…shall I say it…yes, I will. Those were purrfect!

    Liked by 2 people

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