I went to buy a mattress. The sales person showed me a few, but I was unsure and said, “I don’t know, I’ll need to sleep on it.”
Guardians of the Galaxy – the security guards standing outside the Samsung store.
A judge went the mall and shouted an order in the food court.
If the shoe fits buy two pairs.
The toy store tried to sell me Supergirl, Lara Croft and Wonder Woman. They might be a heroine dealer.
Why is the slowest checker always in the express lane?
Advice to men: Don’t try to guess her size, just buy anything “petite” and keep the receipt.
They’re giving the new C.E.O of Amazon a new title. From now on he’ll be referred to as the Prime Minister.
Today I ordered an egg and a chicken from Amazon – I’ll let you know which one comes first.