Today was the quilting group at church so here’s everything I know about making quilts:
I know a guy who writes songs about sewing machines – He’s a Singer-songwriter.
Sorry, but I don’t write many sewing jokes. I keep running out of material.
A little known fact: Christmas trees are bad a sewing. Yup, they keep dropping their needles.
Just hand over the seam ripper and slowly walk away …
Just know that when I give you a hug, I’m really checking to see if that fabric is wool or polyester.
My grandmother once told me, “as you sew so shall you rip.”
Did you know that Captain Picard of the Enterprise was an avid quilter? He was always saying, “Make it sew.”
I won’t say that quilts are superior to comforters – I refuse to make blanket statments.
One the quilters told us how she won a million dollars, but I suspect the story was fabricated.
I was going to tell you a joke about a blunt needle, but now it seems pointless.
Did you hear about the quilter who was also a standup comic? He left everyone in stitches.
I was embarrassed on the sewing forum website last night – I asked a question about embroidery on the wrong thread.