Friday Wisdom – Trains

Our son is visiting this weekend and is arriving by train so …

You know, train ticket inspectors – you got to hand to ’em.

The elephant refused to board the train when told his trunk would have to travel in the baggage car.

A friend of my just retired as a news reported. He left the city on an ex-press train.

I asked the train conductor how many times she’d seen a train derail. She said it was hard to keep track.

I didn’t get the job as a train engineer – I didn’t have enough training.

Why don’t train engineers get electrocuted? Well, they’re not conductors …

The hunter knew that a train had passed by because it have left tracks.

Did you hear about the new camouflaged trains? Yeah, they’re trying to cover their tracks.

Did you hear about the angry railroad? People just kept crossing it.

Why don’t steam engines sit down? Because of their tender behind.

I really love monorails – yeah, I’m really into one liners.

About Andrew Reynolds

Born in California Did the school thing studying electronics, computers, release engineering and literary criticism. I worked in the high tech world doing software release engineering and am now retired. Then I got prostate cancer. Now I am a blogger and work in my wood shop doing scroll saw work and marquetry.
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23 Responses to Friday Wisdom – Trains

  1. Thank you, as always, for the laughs. πŸ™‚ Was it from you that I heard the joke, “You have to hand it to short people. Because they can’t reach it themselves.” Hyuck yuck. πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Terry says:

    creative and funny

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Great! πŸš† Enjoy your company this weekend!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. “Tender behind” – bahahaha!!! Hope you have a wonderful visit with your son. πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I just read these to my train loving husband who is in the middle of building a model wooden steam engine he received as a Christmas gift. These made him laugh.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I used to take the train every morning and night to downtown Chicago when I lived in the suburbs and worked in the city. About an hour each way. I loved it. I was amazed how I could get up, shower, have coffee, and about two minutes in, fall asleep to the rocking of the train every morning on the way to work. I am not a great sleeper, but it did the job. Good thing it stopped at the end of the line at Union Station. πŸ˜‰ (PS – I never slept on the way home!) Have a great weekend. πŸ˜€

    Liked by 1 person

  7. jfwknifton says:

    My personal favourite is the one about trains derailing, but as always, they’re all good!

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Annika Perry says:

    πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ Andrew, these are great and I’m saving them to share with my husband … he’s mad about all things trains!

    Liked by 1 person

  9. I love trains.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. pIEdTyPe says:

    LOL. This seems like a particularly good batch of wisdom.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Hurrah for Friday “Wisdom” from Andrew!

    Liked by 1 person

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