Friday Wisdom – The Lawn

The grass is finally growing here in the desert and I had to mow the lawns this week so here’s everything I know about lawn care:

The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence because they water the lawn over there.

You can make a lot of money removing leaves from people’s lawns – you can just rake it in.

At the garden center they are selling a new chicken-proof lawn. They say it’s impeccable.

I had to fire my lawn care service – they just weren’t cutting it.

I saw my neighbor slumped over his lawn mower crying. He’ll be fine – he just went through a rough patch.

I saw a guy secretly dumping top soil on his lawn – the plot thickens …

The Hulk grows a great lawn – well, he does have green fingers.

I should cut the grass more often, but it can be hard to get mow-tivated.

I have to say one good thing about snow – it makes my lawn look as good as my neighbor’s.

My gardener want to bring a cow to my house. He called it a lawn moo-er.

About Andrew Reynolds

Born in California Did the school thing studying electronics, computers, release engineering and literary criticism. I worked in the high tech world doing software release engineering and am now retired. Then I got prostate cancer. Now I am a blogger and work in my wood shop doing scroll saw work and marquetry.
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27 Responses to Friday Wisdom – The Lawn

  1. Still slow growing here, but coming around. πŸ™‚ I enjoyed your puns, as usual. πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

  2. This one hits home. Our lawn is awful. The new neighbors have done a terrific job making theirs look nice. I can only wonder how much they look down on our yard. :/ I guess we should try that whole “watering” thing too. πŸ˜‰

    Liked by 1 person

  3. “Impeccable” – AAAGH!!! Love it – I’m still laughing!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. kathy70 says:

    Almost makes me want to go out and mow the lawn. Operative word being almost.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. jfwknifton says:

    It really is the power of positive thinking when snow makes your lawn look just as good as your neighbour’s.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Nancy Ruegg says:

    Wow–you outdid yourself with the lawn and mowing jokes. You reminded me that my little brother at age two or three called the task “lawn the mow.” Almost as funny (to us) as your jokes and puns here!

    Liked by 1 person

  7. It must be Friday. You’re always fun!

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Good ones! Enjoy your weekend!

    Liked by 2 people

  9. Dave says:

    Love the entire list on this one, and jealous you’re already mowing out there. April/May is always gamble-time here in Colorado – when to fill the sprinkler pipes with water. Can’t be too soon or water turns to ice and then you have serious problems.

    Liked by 2 people

  10. Lawn mowing season just started here. I’ll share these with hubby when he goes out to mow. πŸ˜‰

    Liked by 2 people

  11. SusanR says:

    Lawns are why I prefer winter.

    Liked by 2 people

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