Durning the summer I wear shorts. When it’s 105 degrees outside, you wear shorts and you turn your A/C setting up to bankruptcy. Last month we had 10 consecutive days over 100 Fahrenheit. For those of you living in metric measuring countries that 37.7 degrees celsius.
For the literary minded, Fahrenheit 451, is the dystopian novel written by Ray Bradbury in 1953. A little known fact is that 451 degrees Fahrenheit is the temperature at which paper spontaneously bursts in to flame – hence the title of the book where fireman go around burning books. Which, of course, has nothing to do with this post. It just something I think of when it gets hot.
Here in the desert, lots of people wear shorts in the summer. In fact there are people here who wear shorts all year round – even when it’s below freezing (32 degrees for you Americans and 0 for most of the rest of the planet). Personal I think this is because some people here are crazy.
I just want to say that I’m not crazy – although I’ve not had that confirmed by a medical professional – and I wear long pants in the winter, because it’s cold and I don’t like the cold nearly as much as I dislike the heat. If it were my decision, the world wide weather control system would set the whole planet to nice 72 degrees with a gentle breeze in the afternoons.
Since there is no world wide weather control system, I restore to wear shorts in the summer. No there was a time when I didn’t wear shorts because I didn’t want people to see my lily white hairy legs and because I was afraid of not buying the fashion correct shorts. I’ve been able to adjust and adapt as I age and now don’t care what you think of me or what I wear.
Which brings me back to my shorts. I like to wear cargo shorts. You know the ones with lots of pockets. When I work in my shop I like to carry my tools, screws, nails, bits of sand paper and the occasional water bottle in the many pockets of my pants. It’s not convenient as most of the time I can’t remember where I’ve put what, but it’s an old habit that I’ve not broken.
Until velcro. Why, please tell me why, did the designers of cargo shorts decide to use velcro as a closure on the pocket flaps.
Have you ever tried to put a screwdriver in your back pocket? In a pair of jeans this is easy, but with a pocket flap closed with velcro, this is nearly impossible. Seriously, try it. Pick up a screwdriver, reach around to your back pocket and it is closed with the iron fist of velcro. When you do manage to loosen your grip on the screwdriver enough to pry open the flap, it will promptly close when you shift your fingers to slide the tool in the pocket. Velcro has this magical property where any two pieces of velcro within 2 inches (50.8 mm) of each other will fly together and stick with the power of industrial magnets.
The only real way to get anything into a velcro enclose pocket is to use three hands. Kind of inconvenient, awkward and possibly embarrassing if done in public.
Clearly, clothes designers don’t actually wear clothes. If just one cargo short designer tried to put a screw driver in their back pockets, there would be a massive redesign and pocket flaps with velcro would be a thing of the past.
My wife has managed to find a brand of shorts that uses buttons instead of velcro. A pair just arrived yesterday.
I’ll keep you updated on the screwdriver in the pocket testing.
