Not Writing

There are times when words fail,
and silence says more.

There are moments when
a sunset brings the comforting
silence of night.

When our urge to rage
against the machine
is laid bare as the pain
of failing dreams.

A sunrise.
A warming of the ground.
A gentle breeze
with the smell of hope.

I have not written these things.
I have only felt them flow from my
hands to the keyboard.

I sit here knowing I have nothing to say,
and can only ask that you seek
the silence.

and listen to what it says.

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Friday Wisdom – Did You Hear?

Did you hear about the dyslexic Satanist? He sold his soul to Santa

Did you hear about the guy who lost his left arm and leg in a car crash? He’s all right now.

Did you hear about the man who was tap dancing? He broke his ankle when he fell into the sink.

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Wednesday Gardening – Seedlings

These are the last of the seedlings from our indoor growing area.  To get a bit of a jump on summer we started most of our seeds inside under a grow lamp.  This bunch will be planted by the weekend.

Seedlings waiting to be planted outside.

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Reappraisal

Once, in another life time I was having lunch with my father.  I’d just been laid off and the manufacturing industry I worked in was collapsing with no sign it would ever recover.  He listened, bought my meal, and gave me a new phrase:

“Maybe it’s time for an agonizing reappraisal.”

That phrase pops into my head at times like these and I ask myself is it time for a an agonizing reappraisal?

A global event like this affects the whole fabric of our society.  Structures and institutions are being rocked to their very foundations.

When the skies clear where will we go and what will we do?

I do know that many questions will be asked and how things have been done will change – somethings radically.  I predict that we as a world, nation, state, city, groups, and family, will be entering into a time of agonizing reappraisal.

Personally I’m feeling my priorities changing.  I am among the fortunate who still have a job.  I have family, pets and our garden.  I have a few hobbies and creative outlets.  I still have my faith.

But there are days I wish I could spend more time on my creative outlets – which to me are spiritual acts.  The act of creating something connecting me to my creator.

Time – there’s not enough and as I age I become more aware of the limited time I have in this world.

Years ago – maybe a decade now – I started writing a post-apocalyptic novel with the working title, North and East.  I have a full story in my brain, but lack the time and will I need to finish the work.  I let my day job and other priorities often get in the way.

Now that we are living the opening chapter of my story, I took some time today to read a chapter of what I’ve completed.  I wrote a short prolog for the story about nine years ago as a way to focus myself.  I haven’t decided if it will make the final draft, but today I was taken aback by what I wrote:

The world didn’t explode all at once, but rather it slowly came apart as humans became unable to repair the damage inflicted by war, disease, environmental destruction, powerful natural disasters, and the steady loss of fresh air and clean water.  Terrorist attacks increased and the powerful nations laid waste to hundreds of cities in retribution.  New diseases appeared that medical science couldn’t treat.  Poisoned water and dirty air weaken whole nations.  Crops failed.

Agonizing reappraisal.

Our world will soon start down that path.  People are already wondering what happens next.

And while I watch the news or view the seedlings in our garden I start to wonder if I should start that process.  Should I rethink the kind of work I do?  Should I spend more time at the keyboard? Should I finally buy that sewing machine for myself and take quilting as I’ve told Heather for years I want to do?

Perhaps these were the times my father was really taking about.

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